My 16 year old dog, Buddy, has diarrhea and it’s pouring rain outside so I have pee pads on the floor which he mostly hits but not always. If I see him assuming the position or he starts pacing, I’ll grab him and place him gently, very gently, on the outdoor mat and say “go on out and teetee” which he knows means to go out and teetee or whatever else he wants/needs to do. While he’s out I clean up any mess and gather the soiled pee pads to bring to the outside trash can by which he is, having lost his balance and fallen into the mud. So much for that bath yesterday.
Getting old can suck or at least have sucky parts in between ok parts or even glorious parts. I often think about the adage “everything happens for a reason”, which is a philosophy I have embraced most of my life. I think the hope of it helps me (crutch) move on from aggravating, distressing, or mysterious events. I don’t often worry about the thing, the thought that ‘everything happens for a reason” lets me move on - usually - then later when another thing happens, I make a connection and think, “Oh. Yes. This is the reason.”
Last November 9, my Yorkie, Sammy, died after several weeks of getting progressively sicker. Turned out he had an extremely enlarged heart which we found out 2 days before he died. There was nothing that could be done about it anyway, but still. Sammy and I were bonded the most out of all the 12 dogs I’ve had in my life so I was (am) devastated to be without him. We become so close to our pets, don’t we? So close.
So now I am left with one dog (a novel situation for me), an aging dog with mobility issues, some dementia, and limited vision. He often howls in the night so I come downstairs and sit with him a while until he goes back to sleep. I confess, Buddy probably didn’t get the attention he should have while Sammy was sick but he’s always been an independent and stoic dog that never required much attention. Now, however, he needs more so, due to Sammy’s death, I’m better able to give it. See? Everything happens for…..
A few months before Sammy died, we took in a stray cat that began hanging around. He was extremely skinny, starving, but had obviously been someone’s pet. Well, we can’t turn a blind eye to a starving animal. Now he’s a family member and lives in the house with us. He loves me fiercely. We have bonded, something that has taken me by surprise because I’m generally more of a dog person. But he is so dog-like in the way he loves to sit in my lap, follows me around, and just seems to anticipate when I need an adoring gaze. I think he’s here to ease my heartache over Sammy - not to replace him, but to give comfort.
If everything does happen for a reason, does it mean events are preordained? Is the path of our lives set and we are fulfilling a destiny over which we have no control? It’s an intriguing thought, one we will never know the answer to. I suspect there are “everything happens for a reason” people and “shit just happens” people.
Which are you?
I value our friendship as well, Charlotte! And I’m, right now, sending you a pic of our new pup via email. 😊
Charlotte, thank you for going the distance with Buddy. Many years ago, one of our cats went blind and had diarrhea the last few months of his life. We did the same with the pee pads. In fact, because Mikey was a cat and not allowed outside, I covered the floor of our guest room with pee pads and slept in there with him so when he had to go at 2 am, I could get up and clean everything up (which often meant taking him into the shower because he inevitably fell into his shit). I became sleep-deprived but I’d do it all over again … and we have had to nurse sick cats before Mikey and since. All our cats are/were strays and definitely the timing of when they’d show up made me wonder. Maxine showed up as Mikey started to fail. Wendy came into our lives as Luisa was preparing for her exit. Do things happen for a reason? I’m more of a “shit happens” kind of person, but when it comes to our cats, I wonder 😉